Your behavior was way too erratic so the ending of course couldn’t be anything other than anticlimactic. I tried to let you down easily but you weren’t having that. Started acting crazy but found out it wasn’t an act. I said my peace but if course that wasn’t enough. The life of a crazy person is always rough. She said some slick shit and acted like it never happened. Well i did and now silence is my only reaction. Text after text even tho I told you to stop. Blinded by your crazy on the crazy leader board you were atop. I will take some of the blame cuz I let it go to far. But the faster you get over your today’s, the faster you can start enjoying your tomorrow’s….
Fresh out of the cage I was allowed to roam and play. Mindset was fuck if its wrong and fuck what you gotta say. I have a switch and I moved that bitch towards turnt up. They say timing is everything well that was your dumb luck. I put the good guy away he was getting on my last nerve. All the bs he put up with wondering if he’ll ever learn.
I had to calm down Monstah cuz he was getting out of hand. Hell I even hate to sit down I’m such a stand up man. Short term thinking, he is only worried bout the here and now. I got an image to keep up, I would hate to let anyone down. I treat people the way I would like to be treated. Life isn’t easy and my self esteem is easily defeated.
He talking bout self esteem like you can buy it at the store. Get with a few girls randomly and when that’s over, go get some more. This nice guy ninja gets into troubles that only I can get out of. Can’t be nice to everyone we ain’t all cut from the same cloth. Now where the bad bitches at cuz I’m trying to fuck. Frustrating dealing with this ninja and all his bad luck.
My luck has never really been too good but I would like to think I’m blessed. Controlling what I can only helps me in not being stressed. This guy on some no love lost and zero fucks given ish. Me I’m out here really living by hope and wish. Cuz I really hope I put away my desires of just being with bad bitches. And wish i would just hurry up and finally find my mrs….(green that is)
As I look to my left and take a glance to my right. All i see is darkness, not a soul in sight. Empty inside I no longer feel the pain. That black cloud blocks out the light and rains on my parade. Drenched in new knowledge I hate that it happened this way. You could have had whatever whenever forever and a day. Mistakes will be made but aren’t to be made often. With each one your supposed to learn and grow from them. A life of solitude seems to be the easiest way. Feelings come and go so maybe I’ll feel different some other day. Maybe the black cloud will eventually run out of tears. Maybe someone will come and wash away my fears. I was in the light when first I started this. And I finish this in the familiar place of darkness…..
No matter how fast you run you can’t outrun your past. You try to forget all the negative things but the memories will always last.
I was greedy and selfish and thought I had the right to be. Disrespecting the only female that was probably perfect for me.
She deserved much better than what I was willing to give. I was ready to settle down even tho I had yet to really live.
They say its not cheating if you never get caught. Well I haven’t had a relationship since so that’s the fate that I bought.
I’m not a nice person like I always claim to be. I’ve done my fair share of dirt and karma is now my enemy…..
We trade likes like two vets swapping war stories. You never settle for less always asking more of me. Not a bad thing it’s actually quite refreshing. You’re not like the other girls my bait be catching. But the only fish I’m serving comes with a 5 star experience. Not trying to be the whole of you but the other half of your existence. And I’m gonna need you as my other half as well. 50/50 splits, equals in all of this is the dream I’m trying to sell. I mean I hope I don’t have to sell it too you to hard. You are better than the rest most certainly by far. No matter the distance I’ll always be there for you wherever you are. I know you’re out there if only my mind can see. You’re on your way to my heart as fast as you can be.