Why do i chase things that i cannot have.
A glutton for punishment maybe, yup that sounds about right.
Nothing about this line of reasoning makes any sense.
If it did then I probably wouldn’t put myself thru it.
That’s life for me, chasing that elusive dream.
I want her and can’t have her but guess what?
I won’t stop chasing her until another her comes along.
Last night I heard you speak
Almost like it was the first time.
I guess it goes without saying
That you’re always on my mind.
You were going thru something serious
I hated seeing you go thru that.
But like I’ve always told you
No matter what I’ll always have your back.
I was your shoulder to lean on
When all you could do was cry.
You looked up tears still flowing
Asked aloud if you deserved this guy.
As I wiped the tears away
I couldn’t fight that damn ringing in my head.
The damn alarm was going off
It was time for me to get out of bed…
Being human has its ups and downs
I hide my smiles and show you my frowns.
Is it a pity party that I ultimately seek
Silence screams louder than I speak.
Flaws wear better on me than designer threads.
My mind racing, seemingly to no end.
Over thinking is the product of many lonely nights.
Optimism has happiness somewhere in my sights.
To think of myself as complex would just be a lie.
I’m human and just need to keep my head pointed to the sky….
The sun shines bright for others
But all I seem to catch is shade.
I’ve checked out mentally
Sick and tired of getting played.
I reached out to you and you
Just turned and walked away.
When you needed someone to vent to
That phone call damn sure came this way.
I’m cut from a different cloth and
I know we are not the same.
Just wish I would remember this
Before I engage you in your silly game.
Even tho I hate the way I’m treated
I can only be mad at myself.
The more I hope you would change
The more you became all about self.
Dark clouds follow me around
When you were supposed clear the way.
To let the sunshine through and
Allow me to see a bright sun shining day.
Too much responsibility for one
I guess it was too much for you to handle.
Lights out for us. Goodnight, time to blow out the candle……
It’s more than time to say goodbye to my misery.
There’s no future in fronting and no future in my history….
Sad for too long lonliness gaining more intensity.
Just trying to find the right one, the one to compliment me.
Maybe she’s out there trying to find me.
I ask God to give her the coordinates to where she needs to be.
Sometimes one has to learn to deal with the misery.
That time is now so I’m saying hello to my reality.
With that I can finally see things more clearly.
In order for you to find out, the man I know I can be.
I gave you my word and it was easy to do.
Just don’t think it had anything to do with you.
Yeah you put in a few words but they never left the page.
Me being socially awkward is never good in any day or age.
I tried to put her on to my innermost thoughts.
She took the bait a little but I still chalk that up as a loss.
They say a closed mouth doesn’t get fed.
Well I opened mine up trying not to expose all the thoughts in my head.
I lack that gene that allows me to talk to women.
Drowning myself in the what ifs when I see others easily swimming.
I’ve seen the pics but one day would like to hear your voice.
But I’m afraid you have better options and have already made your choice…..
I woke up and saw a sky full of blue
Took the roof off my imagination
And when I did all I saw was you.
You introduced me to new hues.
Gone are the dark and dreary themes
Now I see life and all its colorful views.
Eyes wide open now I can clearly see
Everything this life has to offer.
A whole new world opened up to me.
Feeling like I’m a burden to some
I’m just simply taking up space.
I see why I’m never wanted around.
I was never wanted in the first place.
Reality is what it’s gonna be
And it will be hard to convince me otherwise.
Family and friends come and go we’re not permanent fixtures in each others lives.
The life of a loner is not something
I wish upon anyone on this earth.
It’s hard to know your real value if
There’s no one around to tell you your worth…